ioncow00 (ioncow00) wrote in xxangelxbloodxx,

1964-2002 - ~In loving memory of Jonathan Starre, beloved husband and father.~

Today was the day. Finally, I could go into town and feel the needles burn the ink into my flesh like sharp, scalding salvation. It was my eighteenth birthday, and Mo had promised that he'd do it for me. I could have gone a lot sooner, but my mother was opposed. She's probably kill me anyway for doing it today... but that was a risk i was willing to take. I thought about that star. I thought about what it meant to me.
Lightning lashed at my brain and I was newborn in my father's arms. I couldn't see anything, but i knew he was there, rocking me. He pulled my eyes open and light from a star touched on my face, brighter than anything I'd ever seen and anything I've seen since. When it overwhelmed by tiny body I returned, smiling.
At school none of my so-called friends remembered that today was the day I grew up. Not a single happy birthday. I sat at the lunch table, poking the foul-smelling Tuesday Surprise when i got another flash.
I was just a tiny little toddler. I was covered by a blanket and it was dark, and I could hear someone else laughing from across the room. The other ran around and bumped things over until they ran across the blanket, tripping over me, giggling. I stood up, still under the stuffy cover. The other person lifted the blanket from over my head. My eyes had gotten accustomed to the dark and I couldn't see anything from the noonday star, but my father lifted me up and raspberried my belly and tickled my feet.
Mo saw me walk in the door before I saw him. "Hey, Kelsey," he said. "You ready?"
"Y-yah, I think so," I stammered. I wanted it, and I was going to do it, but I knew it was going to hurt.
The lightning came again and I could smell smoke. I looked up from the ground and saw a building, my building, burning uncontrollably. The firemen hadn't arrived yet, but something in me told me it was too late. My mother picked me up, but i couldn't take my eyes off of the building. We waited and waited, but no one came out. I heard the sirens of the rescue crew, and I heard men shouting and water rushing through the hoses. Still, he hadn't returned. As soon as the first torrent splashed and shattered at the side of the building something inside exploded. My tears had already blurred my vision, so all I saw was a gigantic red star growing from the center and enveloping the whole crowd in smoke and light.
The moment the needle touched my skin I could feel the tears again. "You sure you want me to do this?" Mo asked. "I could get you some anisthetic."
"No, no," I sniffled. "I'm fine." And I looked down at the star on my wrist.
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